The SMASH Legacy

 

 

 

Remember Dev? He was in Politics. But not in a Rob Lowe Way. In a boring way.

Ok, FabNerds, I should probably write a longer post for this week, but think have been a little hectic this week so I just have a quick little update. Next week will be longer, I promise.

Anyway, I’ve been going through some delayed SMASH withdrawal.* Because, why wouldn’t I be? I was going to go check to see if Hulu still had any episodes up, but I’ve just cancelled my HuluPlus account (again) in order to support my aforementioned online shopping addiction, so I went to the Xfinity website to see what was left of the NBC’s Total SMASH Wipeout.** Now, Xfinity is free with my parents cable subscription (to you “subscribe” to cable?) so I don’t know if all of you can see what I am talking about/watch this clip, but if you have Comcast you MUST look.

tied up my heart…

 

So, there are some clips that are from the better (if sometimes boring) season 2, but that’s not what I came to see, FabNerds. I want some season 1 deliciousness. I want SMASH Classic. And there, waiting for me like the butterfly at the funeral for that chick who got murdered in Patch Adams is this absolute GEM:

What’s Weird About This?

Ok, in case you don’t get it the name of the clip is “Dev is angry Karen didn’t tell reveal earlier that Derek sexually harassed her”. 

Let me repeat that. This title of the clips is “Dev is angry Karen didn’t tell reveal earlier that Derek sexually harassed her”. 

Now, I’ve watched a lot of clips in my life and it’s not like I study them or anything, but I do think I have absorbed some information about how they function on the internet. First off, they are supposed to either be called something vague (“Clip Number 1”, “Clip From Episode 1.07”) or just give you a little hit at what’s going on – entice you (“Dev and Karen Fight”). Where is the mystery, Xfinity? I mean, I will (generously) forgive the obvious typo where whoever wrote it couldn’t decided whether to use the word “tell” or “reveal” but the rest is just laziness.

“Dev watches Karen put her script into her bag, but doesn’t say anything because he is boring.”

However, I will say that it is a perfect title for a clip about that first season. In one, longwinded sentence it totally incapsulates what all of the problems where: Over-explaination, Redundancy, Too Many Characters We Didn’t Care About…

Why is Ellis The Creeper always lying down in these photos? Did the photographer just look at him and say “Know what? You really shouldn’t stand erect.”

I am hoping that whoever wrote the clip “Dev is angry Karen didn’t tell reveal earlier that Derek sexually harassed her” was doing it as an homage to my dearly beloved SMASH, but part of me just thinks he or she was really tired that night and had to finish writing those damn clips. If anyone has any information on this, let me know. I’m totally curious.

Oh, and I watch the clip. It was short and boring.

Peace Out,

Jessica

*Sorry for ANOTHER SMASH POST btw. I’ll stop writing about it when it stops being interesting.

** Seriously, they made all the promotional videos and clips from the SMASH Youtube page “private”- as in the general public can’t watch them. It was like 70 videos. They don’t want anyone talking about this show anymore. This is my small rebellion. 

American Royalty

Royals from Across the Pond

 

FabNerds, this post comes to you late because I have a job at a movie theatre and I worked late for the opening of The Bling Ring.

 

 

You know, that Sofia Coppola movie based on that E! reality show?

 

 

The movie looks awesome, but that’s beside the point. I was watching a morning show segment about the movie and some reporter said the film was about our obsession with celebrity (true) and cited people like Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton as “American Royalty”.

 

Our Kate and Wills?

I have a problem with this. Not because America was a country built on the idea that there was no royalty, but because I always grew up thinking “American Royalty” was THIS:

OR THIS:

OR (more recently) THIS: 

Celebrities are not America’s equivalent to royalty. Royalty is something untouchable. You don’t pick apart royalty the way you do celebrity. That’s why when something truly scandalous happens   with them it’s a big deal.

If this was a Jersey Shore photo, you wouldn’t look twice.

A celebrity is much more exciting than that. With famous people something is always happening, they have a movie or a sex tape or they’re on The View for the movie/sex tape. Celebrities are not royalty. Royalty is boring. Royalty doesn’t throw up onstage.

 

 

Don’t get me wrong. I love royalty. Like seriously: let’s have a a Kate Middleton tribute for a sec:

…get the difference? If you are going to call someone American Royalty, let it be someone boring. The beautiful famous people who spend most of their time doing things (writing legislation, working for charities) and are only news-worthy when they sleep with interns, but you don’t hold it against them because they are too likable – these people are royal. Celebrities are only infamous.

The only exception is Joe Biden.

Cheers,

Jess